The ONG family Homeschool

This woman doesn't exist anymore.

Firstly, I have to welcome the readers of Vanilla and Mothers and Babies magazines!! So glad you decided to drop by. Hope you enjoy the read and join me for my continuing log on our adventures in homeschooling! :O)

For those who don't know, I contributed an email interview to these two mags for October's issues!

I was asked to submit to the magazine a recent photo. So naturally we tried taking afew and submitted the best one. For the Vanilla one, son and I sat at his schoolroom table and but they cropped that all out and zoomed in on our faces. It seemed alittle elongated because it made my son look fat! He is "healthy fleshy" but certainly not fat. :OP And if he looked fat, oh, there was nothing to save me. Sigh. I looked like a prime candidate for some extreme make-over program or something.

So I must admit I spent a while wallowing in self pity that I don't look as good as I used to. Like after the first pregnancy, everything went downhill from there. For those who have yet to give birth, don't worry, it may not happen to you. There are so many beautiful moms out there! I just don't happen to be one of them.. (Don't worry, I'm actually laughing the whole time I'm typing this. :O) )

In analyzing this further, there were probably several contributing factors. One is the physical changes that pregnancy did to my facial and bodily frame. Structurally, it is simply impossible to get back to that pre-pregnancy figure.

And then, there are other things like the lack of maintenance.

Staying at home, and going out mostly only for mundane things like groceries, has made me very lazy to dress up.  I hate shopping for clothes coz 1. I can't fit into much of the undersized clothes on the racks and 2. It's very hard to find modest clothes anyway. Much to my husband's consternation, (people will say I never buy you clothes!!!) I've been wearing much the same clothes for the past 5 years? (Oh dear, some of you will be saying...) My dearest sis has been real nice to sew culottes for me and the latest one even had a pocket! Yipee!

Plus I have never been the sort to put on make up. I bought one lipstick in during my uni days and never used it beyond one third of the stick and never bought another ever again. Didn't like it getting into my diet. Cosmetics companies will go bust if they only had customers like me.

"Beauty" products that I buy on a whim never gets used even halfway. Too lazy to put on creams and stuff. Occasionally I use a very nice exfoliating peachy face wash. That's about it for skin care. I've never been for a spa treatment or a mani/petti-cure. (Gasp!) Never had the time. Or energy, really.

I make yearly trips to the hairdresser. That is a "luxury". And don't you hate it when they barrage you with a whole list of what's wrong with your hair texture or your scalp or whatever they can find fault with so that they can sell you some beauty hair repair product that you will only use for three days and never touch again because you are too lazy?

I have a untameable mop of curly hair. I like my nest. Most days it drives me nuts being accosted at the mirror to know I've been walking around looking like a madwoman, but I can't imagine myself any other way. *air of resignation* Hairdressers never fail to ask if I want to straighten it. Honestly, I don't have the how many hours it takes to take the waves out of hair. And knowing my hair, it'll probably fight back in a day or two.

Lack of exercise. (Does running up a flight of stairs with the 11 kg baby count?) I only recently realized that we need to walk 3 km a day to count as having exercised. 3 km A DAY! What?? My poor flabby body. And to think when I was in primary school, I was one of those kids who was thoroughly sweaty from play even before afternoon session school bell rang. At pri 6, I could do pull ups from hanging position, you know? Now, it's only my right biceps that are fairly strong from carrying babies around. Babies and laundry baskets. 

What a recipe for disaster!!! I wonder how other stay-at-home-moms do it. I wonder how other SAHMs who are homeschooling do it? I hope I haven't permanently put anyone off from considering taking on my line of work. It's really just me. Unless you're lazy like me. :OP

This evening, my sister's family were over and we all had some time to cycle and sis and I did some brisk walking that was probably not 3 km worth. BUT it feels good. Feels tiring, actually. But I know it's doing my body good. Do you know what the Bible says about exercise? And I say this tongue in cheek because God does want us to honour our bodies:

1 Timothy 4:8  For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come.

The woman in the above picture doesn't exist anymore. But you know what, her beauty on the inside has become more radiant than those 9 years before with all the trials and testing her Maker has carried her through.... and that is what really counts in God's eyes, amen? :O)

Blessings to you!

Proverbs 31:30-31  Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

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Dear reader, if you have any questions about homeschooling, Christian parenting, or just want to share a thought.. whatever, Do Write! I'll be happy to answer questions, direct them to more knowledgeable people, etc.   :O) 

The Amazing Mom Overture

After this week, I need a laugh. Do you?

Depending on which side of the parent-child equation you are on, this will either be frightfully hilarious or frightfully irritating. It's definitely a Haha! for me.

Presenting the Mom Overture, set to the William Tell Overture. Enjoy.

One Homeschooling Mom's Story...

I recently made the acquaintance of a homeschooling mother here in Singapore (someone who is not within my circle) and since we are a rather rare breed here in Singapore, I just had to ask her to oblige me with her story on how and why they are homeschooling. What unfolded was some read!

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`Hi Suwei,

Mine is a long story... So if you want to hear a long story, here goes.....

Special Talent in Language

Between 2001 till 2004, we were living in the UK. So my kids started schooling under the UK school system.

My son being the older one, benefited so much out of this. Not to brag, but he has always the interest and flair for the English Language. And just before we left, the school send us a personal letter telling us that he is gifted in the Language for a child his age. He was six then. I was not really bothered about it since we were coming home so just kept the letter and think nothing of it.

He was then registered in a public school and being a nonchalant mom, I just thought of the nearest school, XX Primary School.

It was new to the area and infact, my son will be their first batch of students. From what we heard, everyone says its a good school. Not that I care.. Anyway, his form teacher, by twist of fate, was a graduate from a UK university. She understood his accent and all.

Son teased at in School

At that time, he has this funny accent which was being laughed at. He could not speak a word of Chinese. We've totally ignored that during our 3 years there... (Yes, shake your head all you want... and go what?) That's what our friends and relatives did. Can't speak Chinese? Goodness. So in class he was made a laughing stock cos he speaks English with a funny accent and he was struggling with Chinese.

However, my son proved them wrong cos we hired a Chinese tuition teacher and he picked up very fast..

Proposal by Form Teacher to advance Son by one year

In March, the form teacher approached me and asked whether I want to consider putting him to Primary 2. Her reason being he's too forward and mature in his academic as well as socially. His knowledge of things were far better than anyone... (thanks to UK system.. I must stressed this). She did not want him to get bored.

I did not know what to do but follow what she suggested. However, the principal wasn't agreeable. But the form teacher pushed for it. In the end, he was called for a test conducted at the MOE. The test took a whole day. After the test, the result proved that his language is way ahead of his peers and so they deemed him gifted. By then it was already in May. Come June, they offered that he could transfer to any gifted school he wants. Unfortunately, my son has formed a very close bond with his teacher and friends. So I followed whatever way that makes him happy. He wants to stay.

The principal told us that he still has to go to Primary 2 since of course, they have done all the Administration stuff. He did not want. So a compromise was reached that he will jump to P3 the end of the year.

One (Very) Wrong Move by the Principal

On the last day of his P1, something happened that change my son's and my life totally. He was made to stand in front of the whole school by the principal. She told the whole school that he was going to P3 because he is very smart and gifted.

From that day, everywhere we go, parents from the school stared and talk about us. Wherever we go in the neighbourhood, everyone knows the story. Kids from upper primary stopped him and ask him questions to see if he's really smart. Parents start talking behind my back, questioning about him. So when he started P3, the parents in that class were all eyeing him. Every test paper and every exams or any achievement he made were put to scrutiny. Everywhere I go, I was asked about him. And all this time, my son was feeling the pressure being put by his classmates.

The new form teacher did not do much to help us. We were fortunate that his P1 teacher were there to support us.. Finally in June 2006, I succumbed. I could not take it, I decided something has to be done. So that is why I decided to home school him and his sister. His sister being in P1 at that time was also being put under scrutiny. They wanted to see if she's like him.

Out of Scrutiny and At Peace at Home

So here I am at home. All I want is to take the stress from my son and from me. And to tell you the truth, although its not easy but I'm at peace. Nobody can say anything anymore. I just want him to be him.. Don't want him to live up to the reputation. I don't need that to be happy.

See I told you its a long story. And by the way, me and the P1 form teacher are very good friend now. So what do you think?

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What do I think? Frankly, that you are ONE BRAVE MOM, to have made the decision to come out of the school system because you wanted to protect your children. Hats off to you!!! And I just know that your children's talents and abilities will further blossom under your care. :O)

MBC Family Day 2007

In conjunction with Children's Day, my church, Maranatha Baptist Church, has organized a Family Day for kids AND parents.

Come with your kids for an afternoon of Bible story telling and fun games! PLUS, we (and other homeschooling families) will be there! :O)

Date: 6 Oct, Saturday
Time: 2 - 5 pm
Venue: No. 39, Jalan Pemimpin, Halcyon Building #05 - 02

There'll be a transport pick up at Bishan MRT. Please email me for more info!

Early Childhood: Building Meaningful, Trusting Relationships

A self proclaimed "faithful reader" (bless her!) wrote to me recently asking about the weaning process. I usually do post these letters up (anonymity intact) for the benefit of other readers who may want to know. But since this had to do with rather "private" matters, I didn't post it. :OP

She has since successfully weaned her little one year old but looks back on the week's episode with some regret. She had heard that disappearing from her child during this period could help in the weaning process and so she wasn't around at night for four to five nights. (Mama was around for a short while in the mornings before going to work.)

Her baby was distressed and cried when she saw a picture of her mama on the computer screen. By the fourth night she was pulling out mama's clothes from the clean clothes pile (to be closer to mama, I think.) Finally on the fifth night when mama appeared, the baby just stared at her for the longest time with tears welling up in her eyes. And then she was extra clingy after that for fear that mama would disappear again.

I remember I "disappeared" from my eldest (then 2) when I was in the hospital giving birth to no. 2. When papa brought him to visit me, he just looked at me strangely and didn't really want to be close to me. Maybe it was the hospital garb and the strange environment. But separation does something to little ones.

I think that as adults, we have forgotten how it was like to love someone so so much that we wanted to spend every waking hour with them. And we clung to them for security and the feeling of safety. Even not seeing them for the shortest time when they left the room would fill us with loss and fear.

That is how children are. They do not understand that mommy needs to go to the bathroom and she will emerge really (really!) soon. They cannot bear to be apart even for a little while. Often, we as adults do not understand the kind of desperation that a child undergoes when their loved one has gone out for a day and their inability to summon them back in an instant. For adults to understand this, it's akin to the death of a loved one, not being able to summon that deceased person again.

And it is natural. At that tender age, children have an instinct to depend on and to love and to trust their parents and then their caregivers. And the parents have the responsibility to mould and shape that trust the child has given to them by being there for them. For a child whose caregiver is always there, the child learns that is safe to trust and in the future, they are more able to build meaningful and trusting relationships with other people because they do not have that insecurity and fear in them.

LISTEN: This is why I am so opposed that children, babies and even infants in our society are left to the care of domestic helpers, child care and infant care centres. The children build happy, loving, trusting relationships with these caregivers (who are very good with them, by the way) only to find that when their term of service is up, they leave. It is like death to a child. And then, another one comes to take their place. Soon, the children learn that the people who care for them are really there only for a short while, (if they're smart, they'll know they are there for the money) and they should not invest too much trust in them lest their hearts be broken again and again.

I have seen even young children with calloused hearts, treating their domestic helper with the distance that an authoritarian boss has for his subordinates. It is sad sad sad.

Parents think it's okay for the children to treat the maid like a maid. As long as the kids love them. No. I believe that unless the parent are there for them, the children will always have to second guess where your priorities really lie, even if you tell them you're working to earn money for their well-being. They will take after you in believing that money can solve their problems.

Yes, I empathize with single parents who have to go out to earn money to support the family. But where it is possible, I believe it is best for one parent or at least one person (like a grandparent?) who will be there long term to raise the children.

As for christians, it is the parents who are given that responsibility to raise the children and train them up. And I believe God has good reason for that that are longer reaching than the immediate, day to day things that we see in our children as we take on our duty to raise them.

Blessings to you, dear reader. :O)

Deuteronomy 6:5-7 And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

Proverbs 30:11-14 There is a generation that curseth their father, and doth not bless their mother. There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness. There is a generation, O how lofty are their eyes! and their eyelids are lifted up. There is a generation, whose teeth are as swords, and their jaw teeth as knives, to devour the poor from off the earth, and the needy from among men.

The Viking Scout Group: a CCA for Homeschoolers

Well! It's wonderful that fellow homeschooling parents in Singapore are pitching in and sharing useful lobangs for homeschoolers!

There's an open Scout Group called the Viking Scout Group that is run by the Singapore Scout Association for children who don't belong to MOE schools. This is a new start up group that is only a few months old. However, they have two experienced Scout leaders who have volunteered their time and service (bless them) and thus far, they have been providing a really good scouting program for the kids.

Already, there's been an exchange program with a scout group from Taiwan, a home stay program and next year, two of the members are going to Scotland for a Jamboree. And looking for the line up of activities that goes on till the end of the year (which includes map reading, camp craft, knots and observation) it looks like they've got an interesting time ahead!

They hope to make it more of a family orientated group where the whole family can get involved.

This coming Saturday afternoon,22nd sept (read: tomorrow!!!) at 3 pm, Ang Mo Kio Park, they are having an outdoor meeting and a recruiting exercise for children 7 years old and up.

If you're interested to find out more about the Scout Group or recieve updates on their activities, do write to Julia at [email protected]

Talking to Kids about Death

I am thankful that I have God's word that teaches me what the death of a believer is. Often it is called "sleep".

1 Thessalonians 5:9-10  For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ, Who died for us, that, whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with him.

Acts 7:59-60  And they stoned Stephen, calling upon God, and saying, Lord Jesus, receive my spirit. And he kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord, lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep.

And so, this is what we teach plainly to the children, that when a believer dies, it is a "sleep".

For several weeks now, during morning Bible time, we have been praying for our former pastor's wife's elderly mother, Mdm Ho. She had been admitted into hospital for the last time about a month ago because her digestive system wasn't functioning anymore. Her small intestines were literally "dead". She had already come to Jesus for her salvation several years ago, and we were comforted by that testimony. So we had been praying for her peace and comfort even in the final days of her life.

She passed on into eternity on Tuesday. I told the children that Mdm Ho is with Jesus already. And the children took it all fairly matter of factly and asked when the funeral was.

The next morning Bible time, No. 3 (almost 4 yrs old) said he would pray but he would not pray for mdm Ho anymore since she is with Jesus already. That's the safest place to be where no harm or sadness or pain or sin will ever be. And I was glad at his understanding of this matter of death and passing on into eternity.

We were there for the wake last night and the children viewed the body with us. No. 3, my dear sweetheart, asked me, "Didn't you say mdm Ho is with Jesus already? How come she is still here?" I explain again her body is here but her soul is already with Jesus.

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The bible teaches that since the fall of man in the garden of Eden, sin is upon all mankind. And our bodies, corrupted by sin will have to die.

Romans 5:12  Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:

When Christ died, with His shed blood on the cross, He paid the price of our sin on our behalf. He redeemed us from our sin and death. The doctrine of the Blood Atonement has been taken out of many churches and modern church music.

Romans 5:9-10  Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life.

This is regardless of nationality, race, whether you are a man or a woman, God's salvation is available to ALL:

Revelation 5:9  And they sung a new song, saying, Thou art worthy to take the book, and to open the seals thereof: for thou wast slain, and hast redeemed us to God by thy blood out of every kindred, and tongue, and people, and nation;

John 3:16  For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

There is no grave or shrine where the body of Jesus is because three days and three nights after His death on the cross, He rose from the dead. Some days later, he was taken up to heaven, witnessed by many people. His ressurection from the dead is the proof of His power over sin and death.

And the Bible reveals that one glorious day, when Jesus comes back to earth again, (I believe this is before the 7 year tribulation) He will collect his children and our corruptible, sinful bodies will be changed to an incorruptible, sinless body. Hence we can be with God forever more.

1 Corinthians 15:51-52  Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed.

The fear of death often takes over us when we forget the promises of God for the believer and we loose sight of God, heaven and eternal life with Him. This is what I have to remind myself and my children whenever we despair about the temporal separation of loved ones through death.

1 Corinthians 15:55-57  O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?   The sting of death is sin; and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Blessings to you!

Heritage Learning Centre has moved to Sembawang!

Heritage Learning Centre is a learning centre here in Singapore using the Accelerated Christian Education curriculum (that's the main curriculum of the Ong family Homeschool) and they've just moved to the Sembawang Community Club! They take in students from pre-school ages and up.

Why am I "advertising" for them? Because all the teachers are from my church and I love and trust them! Seriously, the heartware of this learning centre (the teachers) truly exemplify Christian character in everything they do and how they relate to the kids. Do look at the website. There's lots of happy kids pictures there.

Who should consider sending their kids to Heritage Learning Centre (HLC):

1) If you are an (American) Expatriate in Singapore looking for a school for your kids that uses American based curriculum.

2) If you are a parent of young children and want your children to be grounded in solid phonics based reading and writing skills. I must add, they have a strong emphasis on character building which is really really is more important than any academic knowledge a young child should have.

3) If you are a parent of a school going child and are considering other educational options for your child, (they do free counselling too!)

So much more can be said about the wonderful things they do at HLC, but for more info, please do contact Susan, the overall director of HLC at: (65) 93825753

Apache Wooden Puzzle Project

No 1 was given this very nice present by one of papa's colleagues, a wooden puzzle which is an Apache helicopter when the puzzle is completed. I've seen this puzzle in the shopping malls before and they come in many different designs (like butterflies) and is quite affordable too. It was quite challenging but my no. 1 enjoyed fixing up his Apache very much.

Then I suggested that he paint it. I thought that a camouflage design would be nice but he insisted that Apaches come in army green. SO that's what he did with some green and black poster paint mixed. His sister helped too.

He missed a couple of spots but he intentionally left the cockpit in original color.

It is presently on display on his school table shelf. :O)

TV: Building up or Tearing down?

There are groups of christians who believe that the tv is the devil incarnate. They have no tvs in the house. Anyone who watches the tv are sinners bound for hell. (I hope I'm not exaggerating but I guess any in such a group would not be able to reply me or clarify because they probaby would not allow a computer with internet connection into their house either...)

For us, we believe that the tv is a tool that we can use and there's alot of useful information and good programs out there that can help broaden our children's knowledge of the world and life in general.

Having said that, we're quite strict about the tv time and what tv shows the chidlren can watch. We scrutinize programs not only for what kind of images there are. If it looks ugly, dark, scary, we turn the channel. Also if the women are dressed skimpily, we turn the channel.

We use philippians 4:8 as a guide to what is acceptable to place before our eyes.

Philippians 4:8  Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Not only do we scrutinize programs for the images but also the kind of things they are teaching the children. No, not programs that teach wrong facts (are there any such?) but we need to see what teachings they are indoctrinating our children with, be it humanism, spiritism, romance and the list is long. We will not allow the tv to undo all the Bible teaching we are investing in our children!

We teach our children the existence of God but in the tv programs, He is not even there and they are told Mother Nature or Evolution is the explaination for the existence of the world. We teach our children to love and obey God. The tv programs teach them to make up their own rules and that they are smarter than clueless figures of authority. We teach our children to trust fully in God but many many tv programs teach them to believe in themselves and their own power to change things.

1 John 2:15-17  Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

Lemme just mention one very popular kid's program, High 5. We reject High 5. Why? you may ask. Don't they teach educational stuff and teach a postive message? With their energetic prancing which they encourage the children to emulate, and skimpy body hugging dressing.... they teach the children worldliness and acclimatize them to later embracing the whole sex and filth laden pop culture.

I feel sorry for Britney Spears, don't you? I do not think she is an innocent pawn in the devil's game but now, in the end, her own life is wrecked. Christians who choose to participate in these activities will not be spared the same consequences. Christians who are supposed to be walking in God's light ought to see things for what they are and protect their children from such worldly enticements. Why o why would a Christian parent want to offer their children up to learn the ways of the heathen?

But I guess this has to do with the doctrine of Separation which I believe is not preached in many churches today, hence the worldly church and the worldly christians, (of whom Britney Spears is supposed to be one.) :O(

If you're a serious christian and don't know what I am talking about, do care to write to me and I'll be happy to show you what the Bible says about this issue. Blessings to you.