I wrote this in June 2009 when baby no. 5 was 2 months old. Some of my thoughts on how we ought to find ways to let the baby fit into the family schedule and not the other way around. Especially in Christian ministry.
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Babies need sleep, I certainly can understand. It's terrible when the baby doesn't get enough sleep and gets all sorts of cranky from over-stimulation. However, I'm coming to know of more and more parents of babies (some are not so baby anymore, like a 3 year old I know), mostly first time parents, who sacrifice so much of their time out of the house for the sake of their child's sleep. For instance, they can't go out after 7 pm because baby has to sleep (in his cot). Heaven forbid that there be interruption of their child's all important time for physical growth and development! :OP
Why am I writing this post? I'm thinking about last night. The Ong Family was at the airport last night sending off our dear Filipino missionary friends off. We all had a good time of fellowship and catching up with dear brethren, some we haven't been able to sit down and chat with in a while.
We were out the whole evening and got back at mid-night. Baby no. 5 (2mths old) naturally came with us! When we reached the airport at about 8:30pm, she was sleeping. So I put her into the stroller and there she stayed sleeping till we left the airport at 11:30pm. And she slept all the way home in the car seat and when we reached home, she fed a while and went back to sleep again.
Although we are not full-time in the ministry (as in, employed by the church), the Lord's work and His ministry are a very important aspect of our lives as individuals (hubby and I), and now, spilling into our family life.
As a "lifestyle choice", our children and babies go with us when we need to go. We have interesting photographs of our baby no. 3 sleeping in my cello case during our orchestra practice on Saturday years back. No. 4 was barely weeks old when I lugged him and no. 3 along to Bishan for no. 1 and 2's gymnastics class three years back. Our babies sleep anywhere! They have to! They grew up happy too! :) And I can also look back on my life, year after year, baby after baby, of happy memories of times serving God in the family as well as in church work with my dear brethren.
So, a lot of it, I attribute to a matter of training. Train the child to sleep anywhere, not only at home and in the cot. Then the child will be able to get rested even when the parent needs to go out. If the parent trains the child to fall asleep only in his cot, he's forever going to be worrying about making it home to the cot whenever sleep time comes.
And the other is, it comes down to priorities.. Is meeting all the (perceived) needs of the child more important than, say, serving God in His house? Using your talents for Him in various ministries of the church? Going door knocking to pass out tracts? Being in church on time on Sunday?
It is one of the "difficult to understand until you test it" truths from the Bible. Matthew 6:33 says But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
First serve God, mind His things and He will take care of our things. He has proven His Word true in our family! All praise and glory to God.
Too many parents work on the assumption of one. One child. The parent wants to do everything and make sure everything is perfect for their one child. Throw one more into the mix, all these "luxuries" have to go. Unless, perhaps, they get one more adult to serve the other child. Imagine then, with my family, throwing 2, 3, 4 more children in to the mix, how can we possibly only centre on the needs of the baby?
Other than sleep, the other thing I've noticed that keeps concerned parents at home is food. This is for those who have 6 month and above babies. The un-initiated (eg those with no children), may be thinking, what's the problem? Well, for some parents it is of utmost importance that their baby eats healthily. So, no salt, no preservatives diet. Us asians raise our babies on rice porridge with veges and fish or pork mince thrown in. To get this, it pretty much means you have to cook it at home.
Okay, it's not hard to cook the porridge, pack it in a thermos and go out, right? The tricky bit is what happens when you go travelling?
It's pretty amazing that my family has traveled out of the country every year despite having a baby every other year for nine years. Every other year, with a toddler, we've flown somewhere (like Perth, Bangkok, Shanghai, even UK). Every year, we spend a week in Malaysia with our brethren for church family camp. (No. 3 was 1 mth old when he attended church camp.)
It certainly takes a bit more planning and effort. I've found a way to cook porridge "on the go"! My wonderful vacuum pot. My only regret is that I only found this pot from 4th baby onwards. But again, my babies turned out okay eating some "outside food", albeit very meshed. :)
It comes down to: if there's a will, there's a way. We love to be at church camps to be fellowshipping with the brethren and listening to the Word of God and growing as a family together. And the fact that we have a baby won't stop us from going. By the grace of God, we have always been blessed all round, in every aspect.
After coming back from the airport last night, I've got the itch to fly off to somewhere again! ;) Come little baby, and fly with me.
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